T-REX RANTZ, VOLUME 10

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Annnnd we’re back with another edition of T-Rex rantz! If you’ve missed my days of complaining about inane and irrelevant things, today is your lucky day. I’m not sure if I am just getting more patient in my old age or if I’m just increasingly aware of how petty these complaints are, but either way – I apologize for the reduction in my rage. I’ve got some good ones today, though!

1. When other people walk their dogs at the same time I walk mine: So, my dog is an asshole. He hates all other animals. Recognizing this (and also the fact that he’s a 12 year old rescue and the training ship sailed long ago), AJ and I do everything we can to avoid him coming into contact with other creatures. This means walking him at obscure times of the day when no normal person would be out walking their dog, like 10:30 am on a weekday (if I take a short break from work and I’m working at home). Inevitably, someone else is out walking their dog. It happens every time. I think I’ve figured it out, though, because my neighbor also has a rude dog and he and I always walk our dogs at the same time. I think we, the owners of rude dogs everywhere, just all are trying to avoid other dogs and we all have the same strategy of walking them at weird times. Unfortunately, it is backfiring, because now all the rude dogs are on the street at the same time. Anyway, I would like everyone else to stop walking their dogs, because I am petty and selfish and I am the only person who matters, obviously.

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Very cute? Yes. Very rude? Also yes.

2. When I try to support a local business and they don’t have what I need: In the interest of full disclosure, there are few things I hate more than going into actual, physical stores. In fact, I hate leaving my house in general if I’m not traveling somewhere cool. I prefer to order everything online (except groceries, because that nonsense is expensive) – and yes, I know I’m single handedly responsible for destroying the economy. Nonetheless, I recently needed to buy fuel for my run. I decided I would go support a local running store because I like running and the world needs running stores. Then, when I got there, they did not have ANY of my top five fuel options. I ended up with Clif Shot Blocks which, if you recall, did not go so well. Thus, I ended up having to order the fuel I wanted online anyway, proving my entire point in the first place.

3. When people don’t communicate: One thing I absolutely cannot stand is when people are poor communicators about outstanding projects or tasks. This happens in my work life, my freelance life, and just life in general. If you’re struggling with a project or task or you think you might not meet a deadline, that’s fine, but communicate that in advance. Do not wait until the last possible second, or worse, make me hunt you down and ask repeatedly for updates. Literally nothing makes me angrier. This isn’t even a funny one because I’m so mad just thinking about all the times this has happened to me recently. UGH.

4. Static hair in the winter: Occasionally during the winter (like once a month) I think to myself, “Danielle, you know, maybe you should wear your hair down and look like human being for once instead of just always putting it up in a bun.” And I’m like “Yeah, self, you should do that.” So I do. And then my hair immediately is overcome with static and is somehow both flat and electric at the same time and looks like garbage. I vow not to attempt to wear my hair down every again, then repeat the same cycle 4 weeks later. By the time the air has got enough humidity in it to stop the madness, I have approximately two weeks before the South Carolina air is so humid that I once again cannot wear my hair down. In summary: I should move.

5. People who follow, unfollow, and then refollow me on Instagram, like I’m some kind of fool: Ok, I recognize that there is a strategy involved in building an Instagram following. I do not follow any strategy because I am lazy, but I recognize that one exists. Essentially, some people follow related accounts, then unfollow the person once they follow back, in order to have more people following them than they are following. If it seems complicated, that’s because I just used the word “follow” five times in one sentence. Now, if someone follows me and their account is related to mine, I will follow back – why not? But then, when they unfollow me a day later, I unfollow back. It should end there, right? We’re good? Wrong. Because inevitably, half of those accounts end up refollowing me a few days or weeks later. MAMA DIDN’T RAISE NO FOOL. I can’t deal with it. I will not be duped again! In summary: this is why I don’t have an Instagram strategy besides being petty.

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6. Excessive use of the word “tribe:” Can we all agree that this “find your tribe” nonsense has gone a little far? I appreciate the sentiment, and I like that we found an alternative to the word “community,” but it’s just too much. Not every group of people is a tribe. We don’t need to use the word “tribe” for everything. That is all.

7. My washer/dryer situation: I have a front loading washer and dryer situation, which is great. However, in both houses I’ve lived in with them, the hookups are apparently backwards and the doors now open into each other instead of away from each other. Therefore, in order to get my clothes from my washer into the dryer, I have to awkwardly shove them over both doors and into the opening, which mostly results in me dropping all of my wet clothes repeatedly on the floor. I feel like I cannot be the first person to have this problem since it has happened in BOTH houses. Why, I ask you, do they not make it so the doors can be used on either side? Why must I suffer? This is the bane of my existence and that is not an exaggeration.

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THE WORLD IS UNFAIR. Also – we had to replace the original washed for this set last year. The original one still did this nonsense.

8. The number of things required to run a marathon: You know what I learned while taking the past 18 months off of marathons? Well, I learned that half marathons require a lot less stuff than full marathons. Perhaps I am in the minority, but I don’t take any type of fuel for half marathons or for long runs under 15 miles. This is mostly because I am lazy and cheap. For marathons and long training runs, you need things! Things like multiple packs of fuel. Things like chapstick, water bottles, body glide, a fuel belt, etc. It is way more high maintenance. I really just want someone to pack my stuff for me and also carry it for me during the race so I don’t have to do it myself. Is that soooo much to ask?

LEAVE A COMMENT: What irrational and petty things are filling you with rage lately?

 

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